Being equally yoked in Marriage

The following is an excerpt from my book titled 

 "As I was walking God was talking and this is what he said".  

This is the fourth post in a 6 part series covering the following topics.... 

Fatherhood (posted on December 15)

Teaching our Children (December 16)

Motherhood (December 16)

Absentee Fathers/Godless Fathers (December 17)

Being equally yoked in marriage (todays post)

The Love of the Lord

Doubt

Our choice of words one to another  

Several years ago I spent a great deal of time walking and as I walked I carried a notebook and a pen. I received what I know to be Devine inspiration from God. What you are about to read is what God would like us all to hear. I believe God gave me these words to write down so that I might share them with the world. God our Father in Heaven wants us all to know he Loves us and he also wants us all to know that Love is much more than never having to say you are sorry.  

Please take time to reflect on the words given to me by God our Father in Heaven. God has instructed me to tell you that he would like to ask each of you to take the time to read these multiple times until they really soak into your conscience. He knows that by doing this, you will change your life forever. You will also change the lives of everyone around you. 

Enjoy what God our Father in Heaven has provided me as a gift to you and to all those you know.

 

God Bless one and all.  

Single women, choose a man who loves and serves the Lord. 

If you want your children to grow up loving and obeying the Lord, choose a mate who first lives this and secondly is ready willing and able to take on the responsibility.  

Women choose your men wisely.  

Take notice if he prays continuously, walks in obedience to the Lord, loves and serves unconditionally, is humble, motivated, driven to succeed. Stay away from anyone who does not know the Lord or is a part time follower. 

Do not be unequally yoked. 

2 Corinthians 6:14-18 – Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common?  

Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  

What harmony is there between Christ and Belial?  

What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  

People who do not share a common religion have varying views and opinions on religion and on raising children.  

How can a father who is an unbeliever teach a child how to believe?  

How can a mother who is a believer be both the comforter and instructor?   

What is the role of the father?  

One of the parents will be living in the light, the other may be living  in darkness. If the one who lives with the light is not strong they will be swayed in the darkness. It is easier not to obey, to follow the Lord, Pray, not attend church or tithe or participate in church related activities. Sure it is easier, but does it bring salvation? Happiness? Peace? Joy? It may bring momentary pleasure, but it will never bring lasting joy or salvation.   

The Lord specifically states, do not be unequally yoked. 

Do not marry an unbeliever!  

If you are married to an unbeliever or if you convert, are baptized and lead an obedient life – Pray for your spouse. Set the example, actions in this case speak much more than words. Keep praying for your spouse. Love your spouse, forgive your spouse, encourage your spouse to let you grow in your faith in the Lord.   

Remember “Happy Spouse Happy House.” 

Avoid the conflict, interfaith marriages does not lead you or your children to heaven!   

It is nearly impossible to carry on your faith in the Lord unencumbered by your spouse. They will come to despise the time you spend praying, reading and attending church. They will soon resent you and withdraw their love for you.  

When they do this you will feel unloved, abandoned, lonely, unwanted, isolated, in fear, confused, concerned, and unsure of yourself and the relationship. It is better to do what the Lord commands.   

Do not be unequally yoked, marry someone with your exact same belief; each of you must be equal in your desire to love and serve the Lord and one another.  

It is one thing to say you are a particular religion; it is another to practice your religion.  

The best marriage is between two people who love and serve the Lord and one another equally.   

Praise to you Lord Jesus Christ. Thank you for this insight and wisdom. I love you Lord.  

Do you have feelings of insecurity in a marriage? 

Feelings of not being loved by your spouse?  

When the question whether or not you love them or they tell you they do not feel as though you love them, what are they really telling you?  

You do not love me in a manner which satisfies my need for lack or deficit of or void.   

When a person says I do not feel as though you love me, what they are attempting to say is you don’t love me so as to fulfill my need for love or you are loving me in a manner which does not satisfy me.  

They may have issues with insecurity, low self-esteem or self-worth or even self-respect and not be willing to accept that. In fact they may believe they have great self-esteem, respect etc. and the problem solely exists with you. You do not love me the way I want to feel or need to feel loved.   

First of all the Lord loves us all equally! 

We may not see that or even understand, we may be living in sin.   

Secondly we must first fully accept our self and love our self before we can start to receive love from others. If we don’t love our self, fully accept our self, feel the love the Lord has for us, no one will love us the way we want to be loved.   

Insecure – not adequately protected or guarded, unsafe. Unstable. Not self-confident.   

Confident – reliance or trust. A trusting relationship. A feeling of self-assurance.   

What do you say to someone when they question whether or not you love them? Do you tell them you love them? Will that satisfy their hunger or need? Probably not. 

Do you ask them how they would like to be loved? What would make them happy? What would satisfy their hunger to be loved? Probably not, they probably don’t know what would bring them happiness, joy and peace and therefore love or a feeling of being loved.  

I believe that when someone tells you this, it is a cry for help. Please, I am telling you I don’t feel loved by you anymore. I suggest getting down on your knees together and praying about those feelings, offering them up to the Lord. Your willingness to pray about it is a first step in setting the record straight. No amount of words will tell, someone you love them, they want to feel it, experience it, see some action behind your words. Women desire to be romanced. My actions will speak louder than my words. 

Tomorrows post will discuss the topic of doubt, which is the opposite of Faith.   

Follow me on twitter at billconley7, or friend me on Facebook or email me at billhytek@hotmail.com.

 

Judgment-Judging others

 

Judgment-Judging others

 

Judgment – the ability to make a decision or form an opinion. An authoritative opinion. An estimate. A decision reached after consideration.

 

Judge – to have an assumption. To decide authoritatively after deliberation. To form an evaluation of.

 

Opinion – a belief held with confidence but not substantiated by positive knowledge. A judgment of the value of a person or thing. A conclusion based on special knowledge.

 

The Lord tells us to love our neighbor as our self, he also tells us not to judge our brother or sister!

 

1 Corinthians 12-30 – the writer Paul talks about the church of Christ as being one body with many parts.

Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many parts form one body, so it is with Christ. ¹³ For we were all baptized by one Spirit so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink. ¹⁴ Even so the body is not made up of one part but of many.

¹⁵ Now if the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. ¹⁶ And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. ¹⁷ If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? ¹⁸ But in fact God has placed the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. ¹⁹ If they were all one part, where would the body be? ²⁰ As it is, there are many parts, but one body.

²¹ The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” And the head cannot say to the feet, “I don’t need you!” ²² On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, ²³ and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, ²⁴ while our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has put the body together, giving greater honor to the parts that lacked it, ²⁵ so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. ²⁶ If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it.

²⁷ Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it. ²⁸ And God has placed in the church first of all apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then miracles, then gifts of healing, of helping, of guidance, and of different kinds of tongues. ²⁹ Are all apostles? Are all prophets? Are all teachers? Do all work miracles? ³⁰ Do all have gifts of healing? Do all speak in tongues? Do all interpret? ³¹ Now eagerly desire the greater gifts.

12 – The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts, and though all its parts are many, they form one body.

 

14 – Now the body is not made up of one part but many parts.

 

15 – If the foot should say, because I am not a hand I do not belong to the body, it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body.

 

16 – And if the ear should say, because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body; it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body.

 

26 – If one part suffers, every part suffers with it, if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it.

 

27 – Now you are the body of Christ, and each of you is a part of it.

 

I have noticed a phenomenon lately that I think is universal in our society.

 

I refer to it as using others for your own personal gain.

 

Remember we are called to love one another equally without judging them.

 

I have noticed that many people use other people as long as they feel those other people can provide them with something they need, want or desire. In fact if they find that another person cannot provide them with something they need, want and desire they ignore them all together.

 

To them, the other people become faceless, useless, a waste of time, someone to be avoided, not have contact with. I have found myself and as well noticed others who choose not to communicate.

 

It is more than just not having a common interest, it is rude, arrogant, obnoxious behavior that says I am superior to you, I don’t need you, I don’t care about you, I am not going to waste my time on you, so I choose to ignore you, not look at you, not have eye contact with you. These people have a tendency to be narcissistic, prideful, self- centered, self- absorbed, selfish, rude, arrogant, conceited, vain, cocky, bossy, center of attention, prideful, boasters, egotistical, insecure.

 

I know people who know me and when I walk by them, their eyes peer down so as to avoid eye contact. They don’t even respond when you make small talk towards them like, hi, how are you doing?

 

What’s up?

 

How are you doing?

 

Good morning, afternoon or evening.

 

They simply choose to ignore you.

 

They think they are better than you, above you, and that you don’t have anything they want. It is a different story if you have something they want, need or desire.

 

Then all of a sudden, they are your best friend.

 

They greet you enthusiastically, they want to spend time with you, and they call you or ask you to participate in various activities. They will be your friend as long as they get what they want from you and when they can’t get what they want they discard you faster than a used napkin.

 

These people live in the world and take what the world has to offer them; they basically are in take mode.

 

The best way to defuse people like this is to smile, be cordial, love them and continue to serve them.

 

We are not called to be judgmental, racist, biased, opinionated, prejudiced, and insensitive.

 

We are called to love.

 

Don’t choose to ignore people, smile, and be friendly with everyone.

 

The Lord does caution us to be on the lookout for Satan. Satan lurks everywhere and does exist in many people that you will come in contact with. We do need to protect our self, not be foolish, be careful not to put our self in compromising positions that is another topic in and of itself.

 

What I am referring to are people who when we come in contact with, that we befriend or associate with, through work, school, church, community events etc. we all know people who seem to get along with everyone, who are liked by everyone, and who appear to be genuine or real.

 

They seem to be open, honest, sincere, lovable or likeable; they don't make fun of others, tease others or discount others. There are actually very few people like this, just as it says in 1 Corinthians 12 – we need everybody that lives in God's kingdom. We are not to isolate our self, but to give of our self, our love, our time, talent and money out of love and service.

 

Those that don't do this are driven in part by Satan. They think they are all that but in reality they are nothing but empty shells. They are worried about the outside, what they have, what they do, whom they are seen with and what they can get from you and the world. They are focused on themselves, driven by their own self ego and separated from our Lord and savior. In reality, they are in pain and we are called to love these individuals, have compassion and sympathy. They are blinded to the word of the Lord and by our kindness, honest, integrity we can plant a seed of Christ in your heart.

 

When someone is mean, angry, abusive, hurtful, it is our responsibility to love them.

 

Feel sorry for them; tell them that you will pray for them.

 

I have told several people in my life that I would be praying for them and it seemed to stop them dead in their tracks. People do not know how to respond to someone who tells them they are going to be prayed for. Make sure you then do pray for that individual. It is amazing what the suggestion of prayer does to another person. You see Satan lives in most of these people and when you tell them you will pray for them, Satan doesn’t know what to do or say.

 

We are called to kind, considerate and nice to everyone.

 

Let those who live in darkness and who are filled with evil alone.

 

Be cordial, plant a seed and move on.

 

There are billions of people in this world, don’t get upset that one, two, a hundred or even a thousand don’t see the world as you do.

 

Don’t use people and don’t disregard people.

 

Again we are all God’s children; we need to treat others with respect and dignity, honesty and truth.

 

Don't lead people to believe something about your relationship that simply is not true.

 

This is selfish, dishonest and harmful.

 

Everyone you come in contact with has their own set of unique feelings.

 

Don't hurt someone else's feelings if it is avoidable.

 

Don’t stick in relationships out of fear, laziness, desperation, comfort, uncertainty.

 

If you are married, stay married.

 

If you are dating, be honest, brutally honest.

 

Give more than you receive, love more than you are loved.

 

Don’t expect and don’t assume anything, talk about everything – don’t hold back, thinking it might hurt the other persons feelings or harm the relationship.

 

Be equally yoked – absolutely.

 

I love you Lord.  I thank you for the insight, for the scriptures, for my life. Thank you for being with me and calming me when things don't go as planned or the way I want them to.

 

It is also important to stay flexible, be willing to compromise and willing to serve without expecting anything in return. Praise to you Lord Jesus Christ.

 

Amen.